On Dealing With Sudden LIfe Changes

Ah, it has taken me a while to get to this. And even now, I don't think I'll be able to finish tonight because it's already 11:30 and I have to go to bed.

But a few days after my last blog on Muck Rack, I was hit with a very sudden life change. Lots of people say you shouldn't be concerned with externals but focus on your reaction to the externals. Well, lot harder to do than to say. On about May 14, 2012, I was called into the DISB commissioner's office and told, at around 3:15 or so, that it would be my last day. I would be put on administrative leave for 14 days and then that's it.

Interestingly, May 14 was the day after Mother's Day, when my daughter made her first communion, and Antonio and I had spent the afternoon with friends--really enjoying what life offered. We were enjoying dinner in our new kitchen and just being.....

Because my position with the government was Management Supervisory Service or MSS, and you're not in the union, there aren't as many protections in place as for union staff. Mind you, we're the ones with the higher degrees in some instances. Many folks said MSS meant we had more perks etc. However, I'm here to say that for the last four years, our perks were being eroded. I hadn't gotten a raise since 2008 when I first got my salary; we lost the subsidized parking under the building; there wasn't as much time to take advantage of many educational opportunities; and for some of the time, you're ensuring you don't cross the unions. Maybe it has changed but quite a few MSS folks said to me that it's not worth it anymore. On top of that, your employees could easily make more than you--if they have time in service--or not much less than you make. Now, on top of that, you don't get the protections union staff receive. It can cause burnout and disillusion for MSS staff, especially those who go after education in the belief you'll be protected. However DC government doesn't seem to offer that. Fortunately, it had begun to work out those kinks.

Well, getting back to my original paragraph, I was actually called out from a staff meeting with my then-team to meet with the commish. I felt like dead man walking--and I said as much to the staffer who was taking me to the office where I was greeted with HR, an attorney and other witnesses. Needless to say, it was a scene that should only be in a nightmare. I don't think I remember a thing I said. All I know is that I was told the agency was going a "different direction." I'm still not sure what that meant. I suppose in other words, I don't like you much; I have to find someone else I prefer.

I think the saddest part of it is that after a person, any person, spends so many years with the government or any other organization--when your tenure comes to an end--you can have your entire life put in a box. I think in my case, I must have had at least six boxes. I have watched several persons from that agency marched out by HR or police and I have never liked the practice. I think it's insulting, hurtful and for the most part creates a chilling effect for the bystanders and others left behind. It also puts a damper on their subsequent reaching out to the staffer.

In a recent interview with Councilmember Michael Brown, I did bring it up, and he said it's for the protection of the employee and the employer. One never knows how people react in certain circumstances. (After my May situation, I believe in other parts of the country, a couple of people reacted poorly by going after bosses and shooting them. That's just giving them way too much power in my view. Don't have time to waste and I have too much to lose.)

So, here I am Nov. 2, 2012, on my husband's birthday. I mark his special day as a day I think I'm open enough to write about this. This road was not easy. Change is difficult, especially when you are older. I had a terrific job--a job I loved doing. I was well compensated and I believe I had earned the salary after working for as long as I did and for the skill sets I brought to the table. One person made a decision that altered my wealth building process and the legacy building I'm doing for my children. There could have been alternative moves. There were differences in opinions yes, maybe even philosophies. But I'm not sure it was worth eliminating someone who really liked the work and more important, providing valuable work. And could have provided valuable work in other areas too; but as MSS, bosses don't have to do that for you. You can just leave and that's that.

But it's out of my hands. My control comes from what I do next. My control comes from my attitude. My control comes from the smile on my face and the big old grin when I realize where I am and what I'm doing now. My control comes from the strength God has given to me.

I'm now a freelance reporter for the Washington Informer, www.washingtoninformer.com, the Washington Afro, www.Afro.com, Asian Fortune, www.asianfortune.com and I continue to freelance for Capital Community News, www.capitalcommunitynews.com. Also, I've revamped by company, Invisible Colours LLC, to take it onto a wealth building path. My mom said one of her brothers said this may be a God-given opportunity for me to take the company--an editorial staffing and public relations firm--to build it into something magnificent. This is my uncle who had built up a simple office furniture company into an empire in Trinidad and Tobago. His word, I will hang onto it.

I'll stop here for now. I must continue later. It's really late and I'm crashing. But I did find some valuable things to do that helped me through the immediate moments after my job loss to now--the next few months later. Beyond one job, I haven't tried to jump right back into government. I wanted to reevaluate and see where my heart was, and find something I really enjoyed but which will allow me to live a lifestyle that shows progress--and the American Dream for an immigrant. I was heavily disappointed by some people I thought were in my corner and pleasantly surprised by others. One of my girlfriends said, it's times like these you see who the true friends are; and you lose some along the way. True.

But briefly couple of good things I did

• Stayed For Seven Years at The Government Job --this helped somewhat with severance payments. However, recent legislation by the Council cut the severance payments from 26 weeks to 10 weeks, regardless of your length of tenure. I heard from one Council staffer that the law wasn't in effect until October. However, the last of my severance was late August. But  it shows how the law affects you even when you're not paying attention. The law was created to prevent people in the Gray administration from taking advantage of the payments. I'm not sure the Councilmember who did the law thought about people working the government for years will be affected as well. So, whether you work 5 years or 20 years, if you're MSS, you balance off at 10 weeks of severance. This is a story worth doing.
• Took advantage of the government's deferred compensation, 529, and 401 (B) plans. These are my just-in-case I need to open up finances. So far, so good.
• Brought a Whole Life Insurance Policy when I was 25. Smartest thing I had ever done
• Got a Master's Degree. Lots of folks may say, it didn't help because you still lost your job. I'll say, yes, but it helped me with getting back on my feet. It offered options. It kept my dignity in tact. I buss my butt at Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism. The writing was so different from anything I had learned. But that school was excellent.
• I had put some good work in at the agency from 2005 when I first started where we had built an infrastructure under Lily Qi, and I continued it and created other sustainable programming and communications tools such as the newsletter, the press machine and of course the Facebook and Twitter. Some people don't realize the agency started in 2004, and Lily had to really build it from the ground. I took it to the next level and whomever has the reins will carry it forth. But I think the foundation has been set.
• Not losing connections with old bosses and colleagues. Because of Lily, I am now writing for Asian Fortune. Because of my connection with Denise Rolark Barnes and Ron Burke, I'm a reporter at the Washington Informer. My former connections with Edgar Brookins with the Washington Afro got me in touch with the new editor there. I have other connections I haven't explored yet. But as I said, I want to take my time and get into something that I'm passionate about.
• Kept my faith in God intact. I never stopped believing He had my back. I still believe He does. Even though at times, I feel things aren't moving as quickly, and many times I get into the "why me" mode; but I know the commissioner did me a favor. I wish the Lord's blessings on him and the agency. Even now, God's still whispering in my ear, don't worry, I got you. You'll be fine. So, I stay in faith.

On Social Media

I love social media. I love its possibilities and I love how it can effect change from within the ranks of so-called "little people." These are those everyday people without traditional influences of money, power and prestige. Social media has become the great equalizer. To that there are pros and cons, especially when people use this soap box to spread wrong information, which is what happened to our agency recently.

Below, I've contributed to The Muck Rack Blog, a blog for journalists, which published some work I did for the agency I work for. It described how I used Twitter to defuse what could have ignited a public relations bomb based on someone spreading wrong info. Read it here: Using Twitter to Diffuse a PR Bomb

On My Published Pieces

Some one who was interested in hiring me to write asked for a couple clips. Unfortunately, I hadn't taken the time in the past to place my clips in one site. Fortunately, much of my writing can be found easily with a google or a dogpile search of "Michelle Phipps-Evans" and "DC." In addition to this blog and other work, I am the full-time Public Information Officer at the Department of Insurance, Securities and Banking, http://www.disb.dc.gov/ and I have had involvement in press releases and other published pieces on the website. I prefer not to add my work there to this blog. 

So below are a couple links I thought may interest:

Articles I report on, and write about
A profile on the District of Columbia's Mayor Vincent C. Gray after he won the Democratic nomination
http://www.hillrag.com/CCN_Website09/images/papers/DCN/Nov/1110/pdf/30-32_MCDC_1110-web.pdf

Article on the 20th anniversary celebration of the Hillcrest Community Civic Association in Ward 7
http://www.capitalcommunitynews.com/CCN_Website09/publicationhtml/papers/EOR/1009/HillCrestCCA.html

A profile on DC artist BK Adams
http://www.hillrag.com/CCN_Website09/images/papers/EOR/Sep/0911/pdfs/38-39_EOR_0911.pdf

A profile on an 11-year-old speed skater
http://www.hillrag.com/CCN_Website09/images/papers/EOR/Jul/0711/pdfs/42-44_EOR_0711.pdf

The Hillcrest Garden Tour
http://www.hillrag.com/CCN_Website09/images/papers/EOR/Jul/0711/pdfs/24-25_EOR_0711.pdf

Mother's Summer Time Tea for mothers who lost children to gun violence
http://www.hillrag.com/CCN_Website09/publicationhtml/papers/EOR/1009/MothersSummertimeTea.html

Articles where I am quoted:
A story on the charm of the Hillcrest community
http://www.themattisongroup.com/Hillcrest-n43358.html

A work-related piece on foreclosures in the District
http://www.bizjournals.com/washington/blog/2011/04/dc-to-allow-residential-foreclosures.html?page=all

A work-related blog on the coverage of contraceptives
http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist/2009/11/20/d-c-department-of-insurance-birth-control-is-safe/

Press Releases for my editorial consulting firm, Invisible Colours LLC
http://englishtolatintranslation.org/even/class458693exoti/bring468784
http://translationenglishtospanish.net/foll/requi516871puter/tices470788

Newsletters
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/newsltr.pdf
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/nl_0111.pdf
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/nl_0909.pdf

Multimedia Project
In 2010, I was commissed by the Hillcrest Community Civic Association (HCCA), through the Washington East Foundation, which applied for and received a DC Community Heritage Project grant, to use oral history to explore the core elements that make for a strong D.C. neighborhood. I was tasked as a journalism scholar to interview several longtime Hillcrest residents who have been involved in, or were involved in, the work of the HCCA. Below are the findings and accompanying reports.http://www.wdchumanities.org/dcdm/items/show/1518
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/docs/oralhistory.pdf
http://www.wdchumanities.org/dcdm/items/browse?search=michelle+phipps-evans
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/nl_1110.pdf
http://www.hillcrestdc.com/nl_1210.pdf

On Blogging

I really cannot believe it's the middle of December, and my last entry was in September as we were beginning the kitchen project. We're still working through the kitchen project. It is not done yet but it was so worth the wait.

Here is a photograph of the kitchen as it is now. We're very excited about it.

I think one of the reasons I don't blog as much--besides not having enough time--is I don't get that much interaction with people who read the blog. I would love to get some comments to make sure that what I'm writing about resonates with people. Yes, I have been told about a particular blog entry but I want to see it in writing. I have been writing for a long time now; and although I tend to rely on my internal approval ratings, getting some type of feedback will be helpful. So, for all of you who read my blog, please put a note--good, bad or indifferent. Blogging is social media. It's supposed to be interactive. Without interaction, all I have is a website.

One of my new acquaintances is trying to break into the world of writing. I think it's great, and she should go for it, regardless of how discouraging it may seem. Before I first got into the business of writing in 1996, I used to send out script after script, article pitches, poetry pieces and job solicitations. It was rejection after rejection. But you have to believe in yourself. Believe what you have to offer is unique, and believe it is for you. It pays off in the end. I had made a pretty decent living as a reporter, editor, writer, freelance reporter and now, supervisory public affairs specialist. It is worth it.

On Dealing With Insufficient Time

I can't believe my last entry was in August and we're at the end of September almost. Like most of my peers, I'm still working through the time issues--especially with having a full time job, a hubby, kids, side job, volunteer projects, the home, the cooking, the cleaning. Note that i put cleaning last. Always my sacrificial lamb. It's just not enough hours in the day. And sometimes on some days, you just want to do nothing. I love the "I don't want to do anything song." I wish I had some words of wisdom for others, but I know I'm over-extended; and it's like an addiction. I'm addicted to being busy, to having something to do, What is it in my DNA that makes it impossible for me to just not do. Unless I'm sick or completely drained, I keep going. Take right now, why is it I'm up cooking stewed chicken? Actually, my oldest came back for a visit from college and I'm sending him with some down home Trini food in addition to Costco supplies. Plus we have to clear out the kitchen as we have a major overhaul of the kitchen in our 1937 colonial. That's something to look forward to but I'm putting some additional items away. We're almost there. And I'm taking in "Jesse's Girl" on pandora, best invention. I tend to be a big believer in if you don't use your talents, you lose it. Therefore, I sign up for activities where I can hone my writing, editorial or public relations skills. So, there is a reason behind it. But I have to say, taking a mommy minute is underrated. You do need a minute from your reality. Do whatever pleases you for half a day or an hour or a full day. My getaways include full aromatherapy massages. Recently, since I can't get away for an hour, I do a chair massaage 1 buck a minute. But I'm so charged. So alive. Helps to retool my brain cells.

At 40, You Stick With Your First Love

As I mention in my bio, I'm always going to be a journalist. It was what I wanted to do when I first met Dominic Kalipersad, a Trinidadian anchorman, who came to visit my elementary school, Arima Girls RC, sometime in the early 1980s or so. I remember being very impressed by him, and wanting to be him.

So, pretty much, all the subjects I chose in high school for the fourth and fifth forms were related to my future journalism career. At 15, I even told the counsellor that's what I was going to do and he said, good subject choices--especially typing, Spanish and of course, History. Unfortunately, my high school, North Eastern College, didn't really have a working magazine or newspaper that I could cut my teeth on. However, I remember being part of a group that was trying to start one. I do remember the naysayers in my high school who said I won't be journalist, that I'll just work for the BOMB, Trinidad's version of National Enquirer. No credibility. Good thing I didn't look back.

At the University of the West Indies, too, I got heavily involved in any publishing and printing I could volunteer for. We didn't have weekly or monthly newspapers but we did get involved in newsletters and zines, etc. It was a good learning experience.

My first gig in journalism was with Black Diaspora Magazine in NY. I stayed there about five years, during which I earned my master's in journalism from Columbia University in 2000. At Black Diaspora, I started as an associate editor, moved to managing editor then executive editor within five years. Talk about fast. But it was a solid experience as I didn't only have to write stories, but I directed the flow of stories through the magazine each month; I managed the freelance writers and photographers; I worked with the art direcotr in closing each issue per month; worked on covers; themes; photos. It was a fruit to nuts operation. And the publisher, Mr. John-Sandy always told me I was ahead of the curve with my sponge-like mind; and that not many people could work through an entire publication from start to finish. I took it as a compliment. One of the best parts of working BD was the press junkets off to Hollywood to meet Blair Underwood, Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith, Ice Cube and of course, Quentin Tarrantino, Sam Jackson (I got a story about that one), and more. I enjoyed the travel writing in countries like Aruba, St. Martin/Maarten, Tobago, Jamaica, St. Lucia. But I wanted more. I started out the same time with my girl Deborah Gregory, who was writing for Essence, I believe. We were all kind of starving artists, but now she's the author of Cheetah Girls, my daughter's all time fav. Big ups to my NY sister. You done good, girl. I also met P-Diddy when he was still Puffy. And my girl, Mariah Carey, who admitted her name is Mariah Nunez, in the most Latino sounding voice I've ever heard. She picked a couple of us journalists to come and eat some pasta that she cooked. My girl could hook it up.

It was a good place to cut my teeth, so to speak. It was a good way to spend my 20s; I got mad memories of it all, kind of tucked away though. Soon after that, I headed to Washington, D.C., to be a reporter with the Washington Afro American in June 2001. By December, I was the editor. Sigh. I was really enjoying the reporting in the community, pen in mouth, notebook in hand, prodding and probing, hitting my deadlines. Again, I was put back in a newsroom to do closing of issues. It was good that I made relationships with the folks at Channel 9 as I had to there every other Thursday to talk about that week's Afro. Big ups to Andrea Roane and Mike Buchanan. Of course, I met Bruce Johnson, Janet Terry, Ms. Drummond and a whole bunch others. I still feel a major part of your family, even though I'm in a whole other direction. But you're still the best in my eyes.

Wanting to be a serious political reporter, I accepted the American Political Science Association Fellowship (APSA) on the Hill. It gave Dick Cheney, Joan Claybrooke and a couple of others their starts. I worked in Rep. Robert C. "Bobby" Scott's office, where I met Larry Dillard who opened my eyes to the "dark side" of public relations, more specifically government public relations. I learned about the press release and media relations from him. Plus, I was able to combine how PR people treated me as a journalist, and was able to combine that with what I do, and then some.

Between then, and now, I've worked as a PR person for a Councilmember, a mayoral candidate; as an editor for a contractor that had a government contract; freelance editor and writer; and public relations and communications professional. And of course, I have my own business, Invisible Colours LLC.

Now, I'm a public information officer for a District of Columbia government agency and I'm able to take all those experiences and pile them into one. But I haven't given up writing. I still freelance for East of the River newspaper. The above link is my latest story.

Fierce, Fabulous and Forty

It's a funny thing about turning 40. It's as if there's some secret club or organization that women who turn 40 and who know your age, greet you a little differently. Just this morning, I got a greeting by another just-turned-40 woman, "welcome to the club." I've never been greeted like that as a 30-year-old. It's almost as if there's a premise, that you don't truly grow up until you're 40. Hmm, that's interesting. I always thought you never really knew yourself until you're 26. And self-discovery is the path to self-fulfillment, growth and of course, maturity. So, I guess, I truly wasn't matured until this past June 16 when I hit the big 4-0. Ha Ha. That's really funny, if it is so.

But so far, I've become more reflective. I've found myself to be discontented with certain areas in my life, and contemplating how to change some of them. I don't want to be stuck on stupid for not moving forward or back. But at the same time, you're always concerned about making changes, and their consequences, good or bad. I think it's good to think life through, with all its nuances and quirkiness. I'll take the good, bad and ugly and work through it all with God's guidance of course.

Today, was my daughter, Taleyah's first day of school. My big girl's in second grade. It was really great seeing the other parents. We were all there, walking our little munchkins to class. One mom told me, "I'll probably be doing this until he's in college." Dakota doesn't start Maury until this Thursday. DCPS wanted to ease the preschoolers in, a little at a time. So, that should be fun this Thursday as well.

This is the first time, too, that we didn't have to drop Nicholas off to school for the first day as he's already in college. Classes started since Aug. 18. I felt a little tinge there. My big boy's now a man.